Paging ‘Brave’ Ellen

I already know I’m in the minority on this — and believe me when I say no one is more anti-religion than I am — but Ellen Page’s attack on Chris Pratt sure strikes me as gratuitous. Whether people care to acknowledge it or not, nearly all religions are officially ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE about LGBTQ people. Because of this, you just kind of have to take it with a grain of salt and judge the individual rather than the affiliation — and I’ve seen nothing about Pratt that leads me to believe he’s anti-LGBTQ. (Anyone who’s given me that many erections can’t be anti-gay.) That she’s calling Pratt out after things he said on a talk show hosted by the very Catholic Stephen Colbert while saying nothing about that pedophilie factory strikes me as especially rich. To me religion is like smoking. I’m glad fewer and fewer people are doing it. Yet as much as I wish they wouldn’t, we all have friends and family members who still partake, whom we still love. But I don’t think it’s right for me to run up to every person puffing on the sidewalk and bitch them out. (Should every Catholic be held to account every time they mention their faith?) There’s also the low-hanging fruit element that rubs me the wrong way. Page isn’t exactly sticking her neck out to go after a rich, cisgender, white-privileged hunk. (Talk to me when she flips out the next time Serena Williams wins another major and thanks Jehovah — which Page would NEVER DO.) I say this because I have a rule: I generally will never say something to someone I wouldn’t say to everyone — meaning if a 20-year-old woman cuts in front of me at Starbucks, I’d only call her out on it if I would also say something to a Hell’s Angel. I usually just keep my mouth shut.

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